Over the past 17 years of my Career I’ve seen how industry has evolved over time. We’ve gone from an era of Rules, Regulations, and Stability within organisations, to Merges, Acquisitions, and Uncertainty. Uncertainty about whether our industries will remain intact, our companies will withstand the test of time and of course job security! So how do we Navigate, Survive, and ultimately Thrive from this uncertainty?
Number 1 Strategy is Creating a Growth Mindset. The old age question is Mindset “Nature vs Nurture?”. My father had a Fixed Mindset approach. He saw everything in Black and White, Right and Wrong, there was never anything in the grey area. His mantra was “Life wasn’t meant to be easy and Money Doesn’t Grow on Trees”. Yes! Damn straight…life isn’t meant to be easy, otherwise it would be boring, and money doesn’t grow on trees, well it’s made of plastic, now right?”
Unfortunately, as he got older life continued to change around him, he continued to have the same fixed mindset and refused to move outside his comfort zone to experience limitless possibilities. Any life event he experienced he’d look at it in a negative way. And, because of this negativity, he would generalise life as being one major disappointment, and go in search of proving his “theories” by deleting the positives and distorting how he views the world. His life was stunted, self-sabotaging and Limited. He lacked resilience, courage and relentless determination and had under-developed emotional intelligence. He clutched on the past like a dog with a bone, by repeating/re-living it over and over. He never worried about the consequences of his present actions on future outcomes as it would never be his fault.
He enjoyed criticising others and was quick to point out their faults, he never took accountability for his actions and played victim all the time blaming others for his misfortunes in life. He despised other peoples’ successes unless he had something to do with it, which of course would take all the credit even if he didn’t do the work.
He was an interesting man, and although his traits were not what I’d call the Ideal “Role Model”, he was a role model to me in the form of “What Not to Do”. He passed away on 31 Oct 2016, and even in his final moments and the aftermath of events after his death, he remained that way. At least the bastard was consistent! He was almost 89 years old, he lived a long life….but was it a Valuable, inspirational, positive legacy leaving life? No!
It was in that moment, in that moment of destruction and despair, that my Coaching Practice “No Limits Consulting” had given a re-birth! I wanted to Create a Life with No Limits, and the only way I could achieve this, is to create my Life with a “Growth Mindset” and give my clients the same life skills that I had acquired over my life-time of experience and knowledge.
If my story about my Father didn’t jerk you into action, here are some ways in how having a Fixed Mindset can derail your success:
1. One Size fits all – Black and White Mentality
For those working within teams, working with clients having a one size fits all approach doesn’t work. Why? Because life isn’t static. If you haven’t noticed, that with the rise in Digital Technology, everything around us is constantly changing, evolving, and so too do our needs as individuals. No more do we fit into simple boxes, black and white mentality, the demands for knowledge and improvement is constant and is here to stay. Accepting this is the first step in shifting from a Fixed to Growth Mindset.
2. It’s been done this way in the past – Stuck in the Past.
Those with this mindset are holding onto the Past in a BIG WAY! YES! Ask yourself why you are holding onto the past? What benefits does it give you? Are you feeling secure, certain and comfortable? How is it serving you right now? How does it affect your relationships, Business? Understanding our past and where we’ve originated from is great from a historical perspective. In order to grow, looking to the past for lessons learned in order to create a more compelling present and future should be the strategic and long-term approach.
3. Avoids Challenges/Difficult Situations – Victim Mentality.
Life is hard! So what? Deal with it. Sure, you can take the easy way out and when something gets hard you quit. Or when given a directive at work you challenge it without understanding the logic behind it. However, by facing challenges and difficult situations this is where you build Resilience, Patience, and Reflection, expanding out of your comfort zone to explore what was previously impossible to making it possible, and ultimately builds upon your Emotional Intelligence. As a Leader, these skills are not learnt within an academic environment, you must experience it! This is the only way to build upon your Growth Mindset. It is human nature to stay fixed and comfortable, no one likes change, but sometimes change can be good. As Leaders, always step up for the challenge, say Yes! Then figure it out later. You will surprise yourself, learn more about yourself and what you’re capable of. You have the Power to be Great! Tap into it.
4. Criticism and Negative Feedback – Blame Game Tactics.
There are good ways and there are bad ways in providing feedback. It’s always great to be able to “check-in” from time to time about how you’re progressing. Criticising Colleagues or providing Negative Feedback without a solution focused approach can not only be demotivating for the individual in question but also damaging long-term relationships and company culture. I find even the “Sandwich Method” for feedback these days is perceived as negative as you start off praising the individual, then tell them what they’ve done wrong, and then praise them again! Personally speaking, the only thing I remember from getting a sandwich feedback is the Negative comments. Who cares what they’re saying before and after….it’s what’s in the middle that matters. Perhaps it’s part of my Russian Heritage where you just tell it like it is! But in any case, I’d be starting off with the negative issue at hand, then following up with 3 positive examples of how that individual has done well afterwards. I guarantee by the end of the third positive example, the negative won’t sound as bad and the individual will not be remembering you as the “Grinch that stole Christmas” but will want to improve their performance.
5. Feels Threatened by Success of Others – Internal Perception and Emotional Triggers
Ooooo this is a good one! How many of you dumb down your Talents because of fear of being the outsider at work? Or feeling like you don’t fit in? Or feel like you may outshine your boss and thus lose your flexibility and favour? Are you a people pleaser and want make others happy around you? There is this quote going around social media traps, “if you want to make people like you, sell ice cream! Don’t be a leader!”
You shouldn’t feel guilty, bad, or wanting to please everyone just for the sake off it, as the only person you’re sabotaging is yourself! If you’re like me, you take a job because you want to make it a Career! You want to make a difference, leave a positive legacy! If where you are, you are not fulfilling your higher purpose and are just going through the motions you are doing yourself and your company a disservice.
If you’re on the other side of the spectrum, where you “bitch” about your colleagues behind their backs because you’re jealous of their success. Or feel like you’re not being recognised for your contribution to the company. Perhaps you need to readdress your internal values to ensure that they are aligned with your company’s values. Sometimes they can be mis-matched. Or perhaps you’re in the wrong role for your talents and so you seem to be working harder and longer than others and feel like you’re over-contributing but they are telling you that you are merely “just doing your job”. If this is the case, understanding one’s inner values is paramount to having a Growth Mindset.
In Summary:
Having a Fixed Mindset can stunt your Career and Personal Growth in many ways. It sets you up for self-sabotage when working within teams, with clients, within relationships and within yourself. Stepping out of your comfort zone and exploring other alternatives, other ways of doing things, collaborating with different individuals will give you that dimension, that edge. Whether you’re a Leader, an aspiring leader or an Entrepreneur, how flexible your mind set is, will determine your level of Success! If you’d like to learn more about How you can expand on your Growth Mindset, please contact me for a 45min Discovery Call at paula@nolimitsconsulting.com.au Create a Life with No Limits!
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