I recall early on in my career someone telling me the best way to climb the Corporate Ladder is to “Fake it, till you make it!” I remember initially gaining some comfort out of this mantra until I started putting it into practice by reciting the Mantra in my head.
Whenever I had a difficult obstacle to tackle or go for a job interview, this use to be one of my internal dialogues “Fake it, till you Make it!” However, the more I said it, the more I would feel like a “Fake”, the more Fake I felt, the more nervous I would become, and the more it would make me “Fail miserably”. How can something so trivial affect my emotional and physical state and thus creating a completely different outcome to what I wanted?
Over time, I decided to eliminate this Mantra from my internal thoughts. Why? Because it didn’t give me the self-confidence, the internal reassurance, “life-long tools” to be successful.
I was at a Women’s Event yesterday and this saying was coming up a lot, and I was seeing many women in the audience nodding and chanting “ah-huh” with this Mantra. I’m here to say to you “STOP IT NOW!” We are better than that! We don’t need this mantra to make us feel good about ourselves. The human brain is hardwired and will pick up on certain words and make them fact. Words like “Fake it” “Till”.
The best way to “Make IT” and not have to “FAKE IT”, is through these 5 simple steps, I live by these steps as they have worked for me:
1. Know Yourself
The more you know yourself, your strengths, your weaknesses, what motivates you, demotivates you, what triggers your emotions and how to control them.
2. Get the right people on your team
Once you understand yourself, the next step is bridging the gap of where you are now and where you want to be. Who do you need on your team to take you to that next level? Think Family, Friends, Co-Founders, Outsourcing or Coach/Mentor.
3. Take Action (Repetition, Repetition, Repetition!)
Ever heard the phrase, “Physiology affects Psychology”? Yes! The more you take action, the more confident you will feel. The more you take action, the less you need to feel FAKE! If something scares you, DO IT! If you’re not sure how, either seek help or DO IT ANYWAY! This is called getting out of your Comfort Zone. Each time you do this you know what happens? You GROW!
4. Learn from the Past and Fall Forward!
Building Resilience! Yes! Whether you’re in business for yourself or working within an organisation, it’s important that you learn from your mistakes and create solution focused approaches going forward. As each failure will lead you closer to your Goal = Success!
5. Have a Sense of Humour
It’s important to wrap everything you do with a sense of humour as life is hard enough as it is.
In summary – Once I’ve harnessed the understanding of knowing myself, I’ve never had to “FAKE IT” in anything I’ve done. In going for interviews, in my work, in my business and relationships I am proud to own what I know and what I don’t. If I haven’t had the experience in something yet, I’ll say it. I’ve never missed an opportunity that was right for me, by being authentic and true to my values and beliefs. If you have to “Fake it” at an interview so that the employers will give you a job, you are doing more harm to yourself in the long-term.
Bottom-line is, if you’ve used this mantra in the past how has it served you till now? Did you actually “Make It” or are you still “Faking it?” Make the decision today to instead say, “I have Made it, no need to Fake it!” If you want to learn how you can Make it without Faking it, contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org for a complimentary 45min discovery call.